


Attack of the LA Gangs

by shangrybible



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Shangry Bible, Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Homophobia, M/M, Slurs, gamerphobia, i think
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-28
Updated: 2019-02-01
Packaged: 2019-10-18 04:41:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,962
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17574086
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shangrybible/pseuds/shangrybible
Summary: Mark Fischbach is having a blast testing out his new VR Minecraft rig. However, when the LA gangs infiltrate his server, Markimoo must learn a hard lesson: If you die in the game, you die for real.





	1. Here Comes the Conflict.....

Markimoo grabbed his vr headset. He loved minecraft so he decided to play it despite the fact the la gangs were trying to hunt him down. His fanbase of woke ace kweens needed him after all.

Markimoo’s vr headset is advanced bc hes a rich straight basard who needs the vr minecraft he needed the mineecraft he woulsd die. Mark implied was very good at minecraft, and had expanded his empire based on the mine and craft. Suddenly Markimoo’s brother, Milkimoo joined the chat.

Markiplier scoffed and rolled his eyes. Oh boy. It was milkimoo, his horny transgender cow brother. But that would not ruin this day. For today was the day that markiplier opened his fifth amusement park in minecraft. “Can you shut the fuck up with your minecraft” milkimoo said “im trying to watch voltron and south park at the same time to become peak woke.”  
“Sht the fuck up “ markipliier said transphobically and resumed playing minecraft.

Mark looked at his beautiful block empire. It was full of beautiful white buildingz and asexual flags and racial slurs his fans loved to say. Soon the fire started. The la gangs got into the server. They burned down all the wood based houses and planted tnt around the cobblestone and quartz structures. It’s to the point where he cannot craft armor cuz he cant mine more so he must find new ores… stuck with mining the coal all of the ores the gangs stole… People were dying and marki didn't truly understand why. He was crying, no one was telling him to stay safe :(. Then he saw them, it was the LA GANGS …. :CCCCCCCC 

Markimoo began to panic. He tried to leave the sever, but the gangs had compromised his phat internet. Markiplier realized that if u die in the game u die for real. 

“Oh godoh fuck oh fucing shit im gonna die aaaa the gangs” said markipoo, looking at freddy fazbear wistfully, he suddenly had a flashback of being apart of porn of something he didn’t know why so he brushed it off. Maarjkipooo didnt want to lose his diamonds, he had many stacks :((


	2. Calling Backup

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Markiplier calls for help.

The LA Gangs were closing in on hiim, but suddenly, the waft of Swedish cheese drifted through the server, incapciatating his attackers. “Who’s there????” Markiplier le. 

Pewdiepie showed up nazilyily and said the n word.Markiplier praised his many slurs.  
“Thank you for saving my fellow slur brother.” Mark yeeted. 

“Slur.” Said pewdiepie. And then he was anti-Semitic. 

Suddenly pewdiepie was shot in yhe head and dick with an arrow by the LA GANGS. The bow was enchanted with knock back so he was pushed 3 hundred feet back and landed into a deep hole and died. “Hell yeah, gay rrights” said the LA GANG member who killed him

Pewdie’s ghost was mad. He HATED gayes. He needed someone who would protect his slur brother, his brother in slurs Markimoo…………

SUDDENLY… he was there. Markimoos lover, freddy fazbear. “Mark!” he roared, “Are you okay?” “I...I think so,,” Mark said. He was covered with the bruises that developed on his skin wheenver someone didnt tell him to stay safe for over 24 hours.

Jontron mourned his death then also died bc fuck yuo 

Amidst all the chaos, Markiplier was able to escape. He hid in uhm. A Minecraft Cave.

Markiplier pulled out his Limited Edition Markiplier Darkiplier Snarkiplier Cell Phone (™). Surely, there were other yiutubers in this hellhole besides him and the now dead pewdiepie and jontron. He looked at his contacts:

Jacksepticeye  
Freddi Fazbear  
Sans  
Pewdiepie (Dead)  
Fingers in hiss ass man (komaeda’s son thats actually very epic)  
Jenna Marbles (pity)  
Shane Dawson  
Shane Dawson’s homphobic boyfriend  
Shane Dawson’s homophobic boyfriend’s homophobic sister  
Shane Dawson Again  
Yamimash  
James Charles   
James’s Charles’s pale son, Spiderus  
Onision  
Egorapter   
Game Grump Man  
Egorapter’s creepy wife who loves Shadman  
Shadman (currently in prison for life)  
Shadman’s Parole Officer  
Revenge of the Cis  
Ninja   
Will Smith Fish  
Nostalgia Critic   
MatPatt  
Matpat’s tiny weiner  
Luigi’s HUGE dick  
Light elements of pewdiecry  
AMAZING ATHEIST   
DANATHAN AND PHILLARD

Markiplier scratched his long and bodacious thanos chin. Who to call? He closed his eyes and picked one at random. 

It was Jenna Marbles.

MArkoplier considered it. Jenna Marbles was a chad, and had only given him her number out of pity. Easily, her dogs could be ordered to tear out his jugular at any time, and it was not unlikely she was part of the L.A. gangs herself.

Markiplier then remembered Onision. He called him up “Whats up” said onision and then bhe SCREAMED the n word. There was loud noises coming from the other side of the phone.  
“What the fuck are y5ou doing” markimoo said  
“I;m cutting down 100-year-old trees and vital wetlands property and will later be sued for millions of dollars” onision answered (this actually happened).  
“Yeah well I need you right now” said Markiplier  
Onision was like “ew queer” but it was homophpbic.  
“No, im a het, i need u to save me from these LA Gangs in mindefacecraft” Replied Markiplier smoking the ganja now.

Onision saw it as his chance to assault the antifa and be racist. “I’ll be there.”


	3. The Asexual Avengers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tensions run high as Markiplier gathers his forces

Onision arrived in the server. Logged the fuck in. Just like ready player one!

“I WANNA BE TRACER” he yelled

Markiplier stuck an arm out of his cave. “I’m already tracer.”

Ben Shapiro comes into the room. “So you’re a trap now? Lemme see them badoonkers.”  
Ben Shapiro was killed by a stray arrow, but not in the knee because he hates women. Alex Jones tried to press F to pay respects but then youtube banned him for life.

Onision rolled into the cave and broke his own ass.   
“Onisions have layers. OGRES have layers” said Shrek is love, chadly.

Markiplier then called up Jackseptic Eye, his other lover. Freddy had always been jealous of them, but it was different….his relationship with Freddy existed in fiction. But Jack? That shit was real. Red and blue make purple...it was romantic as FUCK.U CAN EAT MY WHOLE ASS IF U DONT LIKE YAOI #fiction=/=reality #areyouafuckingreylo But Anyways The Yapoi youtuber men Danyard and Phiilivan were there and so was Shane Dawson and the Game Grumps. The Game Grumps were busy being horny for 12 year olds. Shane Dawson, however, was never busy, bc all he did was defend his gay boyfriend’s homophobic sister and feed his cat cheetos while doing blackface.

Despite being busy playing some random SNES game and yelling about how much it sucked without doing the tutorial or reading any instructions, Egoraptor stretched his 12 million chins across the earth into Markiplier’s minecraft server of death.

In other words, it was the perfect arsenal.

Markiplier looked over the soldiers. “Alright markiplites. We must defeat the LA Gangs who have terrorized us and infiltrated our minecraft servers for too long.!”””

“WE MUST DEFEND MARKIMOO,” screamed tumblr. “WHOVIANS, GRAB YOUR SONIC SCREWDRIVERS. HUFFLEPUFFS, GRAB YOUR WANDS. SHERLOCKIANS, GRAB YOUR BALLS IDK ANYTHING ABOUT SHERLOCK HOLMES IM SORRY, DANGAN RONPA FANS, GRAB YOUR HATRED OF BLACK WOMEN”  
Tumblr was then immediately blocked, reported, and deleted from the Apple App Store.

Penc ewas also there.


	4. The Death of Markisnu

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Its all out showdown...who will survive?????

The La Gangs were closing in on their Cave. The youtuber men were armed with their racism, their slurs, their lootbox sponsorships, and most importantly, their minecraft skills.

“Alright fans sans and mario pans.” Markipleets addressed his fellow youtubers. “This might be the end, but if it is, just know we did it for the subz.”

 

Jacksepticeye got on his knee and pulled out a nice phat juciy stack of 64 diamonds. “Mark, you know.. i always loved you” he held the diamonds in his mine to markis face… i felt that…..

“I DIAGNOSE U WITH GAY” screamed onision righteously. He was now working for the NSA and was watching all this from the Whtie House. “IM GOING TO SEND U TO MY INTERNMENT CAMP FOR HOMOS NOW”

But it was the too late. The LA Gangs were storming the cave. 

*********** YAOI OVERLOAD WARNING UWU ************************

NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
Unable to hold back anymore, Markiplier took Jackseptumkai into his buff arms and threw into a wall but in a sexy woke way. Jaxseptictank’s body immediately imploded as a single tear went down his face and marrikplyers was like “nice.” he then leaked jacsonsepticularian’s nudes onto twitter and then crytypped over it and was instantly forgiven.

************** SMEXINESS OVER, BACK TO THE PLOT OWO ************************

Dan and Phil were able to hold off the gang with their yaoi love, but that only lasted a short time. The gangs broke through and trampled them to death. Shane Dawson followed shortly after with a swift kick to the head. He uttered one last slur as he slipped into oblivion.   
“..... twink,” the dying dawson groaned in a very UK way.

Markiplier, Onision, and Egorapter were pushed up against the edge of a mien craft cliff. The crowd of LA Gang members parted.

The leader of the la gang showed up… he had many large full stacks of tnt. He pulled off his black suit to reveal… it was mark fuckerberg himself. And he was… extremely thicc. 

“Mark Zuckerberg?!?!?!?” Mark growled like a buff wolf man. “But why?????”

“Tch…” Mark Zuckerborgeouise zucked zuckingly. “There can only be one Billionare Capitalist Mark, and thats Me. With the opening of your fifth minecraft amusement park, that title could be taken from me.”

Zuckerberg’’s daddy Bill Gates, the prom queen, watched all this with a big capitalist smile on his face, from his private spy satellite that he couldve used to end poverty but spyring on people is more fun. Jeff Bexos was too busy getting divorced to join but Elon Musk was there and he was SLONKING A FAT BLUNT GAMERS RISE UP!!!!!!!!!!!

Markiplier kneeled down….focusing…”No….it cant be….I’v e worked so hard….”

The LA Gangs forced Onision off the edge. He sweated and cried but his homophobic tirade was put to an end. Egorapter soon followed, but not before playing Sonic Adventure Two just so he could be obnoxious and make sexual jokes about Rouge. We are all Glad He is Dead.

“Any last words, mark?” Mark marked.

Markiplier thought about these past 8 years. His youtube channel. His mine craft lets plays. His amusement parks. And most importantly...his subscribers….

“Yeah….” Said mark, standing up. “I got one word for you….”

Mark channeled all his energy. His body began to warp. The mincraft world rumbled with the sheer power of markimoo.

https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/379/930/d6e.png

The exclamation rang out over the minecraft LA Gangs, throwing them back down the hill, with only The Zuck remaining. 

Super Mark smirked. 

Mark Zucvkerberg screamed in rage. “This isnt over, MARK!!!!!!!!!IPLIERT” He then ran away to his minecraft voltron ship.

It was over. Mark had won. He logged off of his minecraft serve, internet now safe from the gangs. He took off his VR headset and body rig. “That was so crazy. I better tell Facebook about this!”

Markiplier logged onto Facebook, but something was wrong….His account was not wjhat he remembered it as. On all of his pictures were comments that said things like:

“RIP”  
“Miss you Markimoo.”  
“We should have stopped the gangs…”

MArkiplier was baffled.And then he realized it. His last facebook1 post was dated over 200 years ago. “No…!!!!!”

Markiplierndrew back his shades and looked outside. There was a Zuckbot at his window. It shot through the window and mark dropped on the floor, dead.

Through the eyes of the Zuckbot, Overlord Zuckerberg Nega watched the scene go down. He turned to the voltron paladin next to him

“Slaps shiro’s nonexistent ass” - mark zuckerberg

THE End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “I AM TEH DEARKEST OF WAVES I AM THE DEEPEST OF DARKNESS I AM THE SHARPEST BREAD IN THE KITCHEN KNIFE I LL CUT UR HAM SANDWICH IN AN EDGY WAY AT SUBWAY SHADOW PLS RESPOND I SENT U MY FACE PICS PLS DONT CUCK ME IM DYINGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGANGWEED” said infinite as he got kicked in the face by every charcter on the original top ten hottest female sonic characters list  
> You guys make me homophobic are u a fucking reylo  
> Check out the rest of my ao3 for my trans man sonic abandoning his child because shadow bought hrt at walgreens fanfics #mochilivesdontmatter  
> Stop posting the fetus
> 
> I wish, Iw as dead
> 
>  
> 
> Voltron, also known as stonewall 2


End file.
